Elon is another day short of trillionaire status

In a world of oppression and conflict, there is one injustice that stands above it all: Elon Musk is not a trillionaire today.

when SpaceX has gone public Earlier this month, Musk became number one in the world Trillionaire. He declared in a triumphant speech that he aspires to take us all to the moon, Mars, and “perhaps beyond the solar system.” He awkwardly threw his fists in the air as his aides cheered him on.

But stock prices You fluctuatehe is now just a multi-hundred dollar billionaire, according to the Bloomberg Billionaires Index.

Honestly, it’s embarrassing. How will Musk support… Legion Of offspring? Could he even continue to expand his already large brood, given his honesty? prenatal? The mathematics is getting more complicated.

We wish him the best as he navigates this difficult time. And Elon, if you need a good rice and beans recipe, or some tips on how to make big at the thrift store, we can point you in the right direction.