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No one in my house grew up on the Jonas Brothers. The only brothers in the band my husband and I started were Liam and Noel Gallagher, and my kids, ages 12 and 7, were completely out the window when Nick, Kevin, and Joe Jonas were teen fans of a hit TV show. However, I’m here to tell you that everyone in my house LOVED the new Jonas Brothers movie, A Very Jonas Christmas Movie (out this weekend). On Disney Plus), although none of us are necessarily the target audience.
A Very Jonas Christmas Movie is probably the most generic title anyone could give this movie, so it doesn’t give you an idea of what you want when you watch it. In the first scene, Will Ferrell is shown playing an enhanced version of himself, forcing his family to attend a Jonas Brothers concert in London because he is a huge fan. “If my children fall out of the boat and you fall out of the boat, I will save you from my children!” Ferrell shouts at the band as they perform a concert later in the film.
This scene sets the tone for what’s to come: a sharp, well-crafted road-trip comedy that mines a lot of jokes about how bad the Jonas Brothers are now that they’re tired, “old” parents in their 30s — with the brothers making most of the jokes at their own expense. I wasn’t in a relationship with the Jonas, but I’m also a tired parent who uses self-denial as a survival tool. Maybe I have more in common with these former teen stars than I thought? Makes me forgive them for using such a dull title.
The film begins at the final concert of the Jonas Brothers’ world tour, a few days before Christmas. When the show ends, Nick, Joe and Kevin Jonas plan to take their private plane from London to New York to see their families. However, the brothers didn’t get along, and when Joe had the chance to meet Santa Claus (played by Jesse Tyler Ferguson) at a bar, Santa realized the Jonas family needed some time together to reconnect. So Santa does what you’d expect Santa to do, and delivers a friendly curse to the brothers. Its first impact causes their plane to explode before they can board it, forcing them to work together to find a way home. (This isn’t the only plane in the movie that becomes a fireball, you know.)
What follows is a series of mishaps and a cavalcade of celebrities, including KJ Apa as a pilot, Andrea Martin as a taxi driver who doesn’t really know how to drive, and Kenny G himself (which I won’t spoil for you), as the brothers desperately try to get home, with Santa’s curse ravaging them in every city in Europe.
Andrew Barth Feldman and Nick Jonas in A Very Jonas Christmas
As a cynic (remember how you grew up with Oasis? Sarcasm is the default setting for my generation), I wasn’t trying to be impressed by the long list of standouts. A lot of movies have a lot of cameos, and they’re garbage. But every celebrity in A Very Jonas Christmas Movie understands the mission here: go big or go home.
While Will Ferrell begins the film memorably, one of the funniest moments comes when Nick Jonas encounters a (fictional) enemy named Ethan, a child star with whom Nick performed in the musical Home Alone Broadway (also fictional, but I… He wishes It was real.) Actual Broadway actor Andrew Barth Feldman plays Ethan, and while he may not be the biggest famous name in the movie, his performance with Nick, as they sing a fake song from Home Alone, is funny on many levels. Chloe Bennet, who starred in Agents of SHIELD and is a former teen pop star, also stars in the film. Not only does she display impressive singing skills during her duet with Joe, but she also forces the film to acknowledge that Joe’s love life has been tabloid fodder for years, and is handled in a smart, self-aware way within a fictional setting. (It turns out I am no Too old to know all the latest details about Joe Jonas’ divorce game of thrones Star Sophie Turner.)
Not surprisingly, the strength of the film lies in the Jonas family themselves. They perform many original, new and festive musical numbers that are all incredibly catchy (and they perform a live version of their single, Sucker, during the closing credits), and their great comedic abilities are on display in every scene. Kevin is often the butt of jokes for being the least attractive actor in the family (a piece of “human cardboard” as Nick puts it), but he owns it and turns it into some great comedy, while Joe’s romantic storyline allows him to show off his side of what his brothers call “the lovable tramp.” The real-life brothers’ pet peeves and cheap shots between them feel real, but it’s also like admitting that they know exactly what’s being said about their public personas — and now they’re in on the joke.
When you review movies, you’re often asked to sign an embargo that doesn’t allow you to reveal details or spoilers, and the ban on A Very Jonas Christmas Movie was one of the strictest I’ve had to agree to as well. Reviewers were asked not to share publicly that they had even received pre-screenings. It’s rare that I want to brag about the cool things I watch and do at work on social media (I have to keep it honest) but the fact that I haven’t been allowed to discuss watching the movie for the past two weeks has been tough because I literally wanted to tell as many people as possible to watch this movie when it comes out, and it’s just so much fun. As much as I’ve tried to avoid the Jonas for the past 20 years because I assumed they weren’t my thing, well, the joke’s on me, because I was missing out. Turns out these kids are talented!
Oh, and not for nothing, the movie ends with Santa, who was happy to help re-establish Jonas’ brotherly love, rushing in because he needs the help of another band in need… OASIS.